Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I Sat On the Front Porch.

I sat on the front porch this afternoon, finally. It was awesome!

Okay, I just realized how insane that sounds. But it was awesome. I’ve been struggling to figure out how I used to--and how other people--fit kick-back time into their lives.

I miss sitting on the front porch. I miss walks. I miss walking to the falls every night and meditating by the river. I miss sitting back with a glass of wine and just listening to music.

My whole house is my business, save our kitchen and bedroom. I miss sitting in a living room to watch TV. I miss having a fireplace, and a couch on which to cuddle up to DH.

I miss a life without the incessant never-done to-do list. I feel guilty doing
anything relaxing, because there’s so much to be done. I swear, I never stop, and most of the time I’m multi-tasking. It’s frazzling. And when I drive or shower or try to sleep, my mind is going a million miles a minute.

Do you ever just get sick to death of hearing yourself think?

The whole entire universe is telling me to stop thinking, and my mind won’t shut up.

8 bonus scribbles:

Liz Wolfe 8/29/2007 03:14:00 PM  

Meditation. Sounds like you need to re-learn how to slow down. Probably we all do. I know I sometimes get in that mode of doing five things at once and hurrying through something in order to get to the next thing.
No wonder we're stressed out!

Lorraine 8/29/2007 08:25:00 PM  

I've been on overdrive for the past two months. I can't shut it off. I haven't been able to write. I've been doing nothing but catching up and networking and that doesn't get words on the page.

I'm exhausted and I no longer know how to relax.

I might need cold temps, cold rains, and gray days to accomplish it.

Edie 8/29/2007 11:18:00 PM  

Natash, get a dog! I take mine for walks (when the weather is okay), and I get my best ideas walking her. She's a high energy dog, a field-type English setter, and I feel guilty when I don't walk her.

StarvingWriteNow 8/30/2007 11:34:00 AM  

Dear Natasha:

Stop thinking!

Love, The Universe

spyscribbler 8/30/2007 11:36:00 AM  

LOL, Liz, I do need to. I'm trying to teach myself to do one thing at once. How novel!

I hear you, Lorraine! I do focus better during gray days. Why is that? I write SO well when it's cloudy and rainy.

LOL, Edie! I'd love to! But walks aren't in my near future. The foot, still. If the foot could take walks, I'd be at Taekwondo in a heartbeat, before I could blink!

She sounds so cute! I love English setters. All summer, I thought about getting one before DH came home, and giving him the guilt trip about being lonely. It's so tempting!

Edie 8/30/2007 10:00:00 PM  

Spy, wait until you can walk before you get the dog. And try for the bench-type English setters. They're not as high energy as the field type -- although a lot more expensive. But all English setters are sweethearts. :)

spyscribbler 9/01/2007 12:14:00 PM  

Bench? Field? Oh, boy. I need to do research. Actually, I was kinda hoping for a mutt-ish sort of English Setter, LOL.