Contrary to my enthusiasm for the holiday season, I actually do not much care for holidays. I enjoy Halloween, but that’s about it. (Although, I celebrate Halloween for the entire month of October ...) I celebrate January 1 for a good two weeks or so, evaluating my life. That’s nice, too.
I’ve always tried to live my life doing the things I want to do. I wanted to play piano, so I did. I didn’t want to get sick, but I did, and I ended up teaching. I was never going to be one of those teachers that didn’t want to teach, though. I figured the universe had made me sick particularly so I could find my way to teaching, and I was grateful.
So I teach, I play. I like to write, so I write. I like to spend time with DH, so I do. I like to read, so I try to read. I like to workout, so I try.
I try to be thankful everyday. I often forget to say it, but I feel it. And I try to pass it on a lot. If someone does something that touches me, that’s really kind and unexpected, I try to find a way to pass it on. Passing it back always feels like you’re devaluing it, you know? Mostly because I always feel that what I pass back is so very little in comparison to how I was touched.
So you know what really gets me about the day of a holiday? Not only do I have to STOP going along and enjoying the life that my little family has chosen, but we have to be happy about doing none of what we love to do and all of what makes me uncomfortable, like dealing with family politics, students not paying their bills, and worrying about making everyone else feel happy.
Because there is high performance pressure on that ONE DAY to be happy, and if you’re not happy, then you’ve failed at something HUGE. You get depressed. Well, at least DH does. It’s really ridiculous.
Me? I’d rather just go about my business and pretend that one day doesn’t exist. Really, truly.
I do, however, love the holiday season, which is why I celebrate Christmas lights several times a day, every day, from November 1 until January 1. The only reason I take them down on January 1 is because of the electric bill, and I can respect that if I left them up all year long, they wouldn’t hold the same magic.
I’d much rather have a Thanksgiving life than a Thanksgiving day.